EFT Tapping: A Complete Guide to Emotional Freedom Technique
The technique that took me from fearful and reactive to grounded and calm — and helped me grow ¾ of an inch in my 50s. Watch the original video here.*
If you’ve ever felt stuck in a pattern you can’t break, triggered by things that shouldn’t matter that much, or weighed down by something you can’t quite name — EFT tapping may be the most powerful tool you haven’t fully explored yet.
EFT stands for Emotional Freedom Technique. Most people call it tapping, because it involves tapping on specific meridian points on the body while speaking your truth about what you’re feeling. It’s simple enough to learn in an afternoon and deep enough to use for a lifetime.
What makes EFT different from other approaches is this: it only works when you’re willing to focus on the negative. That might sound counterintuitive — but the stored negative emotions in your body are exactly what’s keeping you stuck. Acknowledging them isn’t making things worse. It’s how you release them.
What You Can Tap On
The short answer: almost anything that’s stealing your peace.
- A memory or past trauma
- An emotion you’re feeling right now—anger, fear, grief, shame
- A belief or pattern that keeps resurfacing
- Something that happened recently—an argument, a disappointment, a difficult conversation
- Worry about the future
- Things happening in the world that weigh on you
You don’t need to fully understand what you’re feeling to start. Sometimes tapping uncovers the hidden emotion for you. The key is honesty. The more truthful you are about the emotional charge behind what you’re working on, the faster it releases.
The Nine Tapping Points
Before walking through the procedure, here are the nine core points used in an EFT sequence:
- Karate chop point — the fleshy outer edge of the hand, below the pinky
- Top of the head — the crown
- Eyebrow point — where the eyebrows begin, near the bridge of the nose
- Side of the eye — the bone on the outer edge of the eye socket
- Under the eye — the bone directly beneath the eye
- Under the nose — between the nose and upper lip
- Chin point — the dimple between the lower lip and chin
- Collarbone point — just below the hard knobs of the collarbone, slightly outward
- Under the arm — about four inches below the armpit
You can tap on either side of the body, or both. Tap firmly enough that your nervous system registers it, but not so hard that it’s uncomfortable.
How to Tap: A Step-by-Step Example
Three factors determine how quickly tension releases: how long you tap, how present you are while doing it, and how well you can stay focused on what you’re working through. The better you are at all three, the faster things shift.
Here’s the full procedure using a simple example — fear of making a phone call.
Step 1: Rate the Intensity
Give your feeling a number from 0 to 10. Zero means it doesn’t bother you at all; ten means it feels unbearable. Don’t overthink it — just go with whatever comes to mind. This gives you a reference point to measure whether things are shifting.
Step 2: The Opening Round — Name the Truth
Begin on the karate chop point. Repeat this three times while tapping continuously:
“I’m afraid of making this phone call. That’s my truth, and it’s okay that I feel this way.”
This opening phrase matters. You’re not saying the situation is fine — you’re acknowledging what’s actually true for you. The moment something is fully accepted, it begins to release. That’s not a platitude; it’s what actually happens.
Step 3: Tap Through the Points — Acknowledge the Wound
Move through each of the nine points, repeating a simple phrase that names what you’re feeling:
“I’m afraid of making this phone call.”
It may feel repetitive. That’s intentional. When it starts to feel boring, the energy is beginning to shift.
Step 4: Vary the Words — Clean Around the Edges
On the next round, vary your language to find the words that feel most true:
- “I’m afraid of what they’ll say.”
- “I’m afraid I’ll say the wrong thing.”
- “I’m afraid of being rejected.”
- “I’m afraid they’ll get angry.”
Keep going until something lands — until you find yourself thinking, yes, that’s exactly it. That’s when the release deepens.
Step 5: Check Your Number
Where are you on the 0–10 scale now? If you’re still above a two, keep tapping. If you’ve dropped to a two or below, you can move into a gentler integration round, softening toward something more neutral or even slightly positive.
Signs Your Body Is Releasing
Watch for these during or after tapping — they’re all signs that something is shifting:
- Yawning or sighing
- Feeling sleepy
- Tears
- A burp or other physical release
- A memory surfacing that you hadn’t thought of in years
All of these are feedback. Something moved.
Going Deeper: Working with Memories
Once the immediate intensity drops, ask yourself: when was the first time I felt this way?
When a memory comes up, tap through it too. Treat it like a movie — give it a name, describe the scene, and walk through what happened moment by moment. When you reach the end, start again from the beginning. Repeat as many times as needed, over as many sessions as it takes, until the memory becomes just a story — calm, neutral, and flat. That’s when you know the energy has fully released.
Air Tapping: A Powerful Variation
Air tapping is a variation that can go even deeper than traditional tapping, particularly when you’re carrying tension about another person.
Picture the person sitting in front of you. Imagine their face close enough that you can tap on their meridian points in the air. Then speak — say what you never said out loud. Let it be raw, honest, messy, or tender. Whatever is true.
You can air tap on:
- Someone you had a conflict with
- A parent, child, or colleague
- Someone who caused you harm
- A younger version of yourself
That last one is especially powerful. Tapping on your younger self — the child who was frightened, humiliated, or unseen — is a form of repair that goes very deep. When that younger self finally feels heard and safe, invite them into a hug. Let them dissolve back into you, held and seen at last.
When you’re finished, return to tapping on yourself to integrate whatever came up.
Key Takeaways
EFT works by focusing on the negative, not avoiding it. Acknowledgment is the first step to release.
The opening phrase is the foundation. Naming your truth and accepting it — even when it’s painful — is what allows the energy to move.
Repetition isn’t a flaw in the process. When tapping starts to feel boring, that’s the signal something is shifting.
Air tapping accesses a different layer of truth — one that can be harder to reach when you’re only tapping on yourself.
The long-term effect of regular tapping is a nervous system that learns it’s safe to feel — which gradually deepens awareness and reduces the need to tap at all.
“Every time you tap, you are changing the direction of your future.”
Where to Begin
Write down every emotional memory that still carries a charge — every humiliation, fear, resentment, grief, or regret you can recall. Then, one at a time, tap through them. Not all in one sitting. One memory per session, as many evenings as it takes, until the list is clear and your nervous system is quieter than it has ever been.
That’s exactly how this practice changed my life — and how it can change yours.
To understand the full journey of what’s possible when you commit to this work over time, including the unexpected physical changes that followed years of emotional release, watch How I Healed My Body from the Inside Out.